Saturday, March 06, 2004

It's been a long time since I left you...

Awwwww snap!

Life has been a little to hectic to document regularly but fuck it...I'll do some bloggin on the company clock.
Shit. Time to finally get paid for this exquisite command of the English language I demonstrate occasionally. Yes Yes Yes. Spent some time at this bar last night celebratin my boy's (not my son tho-gotta know the vernacular ya'll) birthday at this place called the Alley Cat. Twas a good time I suppose.
I got to see some dudes I went to high-school with that are in a band (In fact, it's We sat in the same room for a few hours before they noticed me. One dude was reeeeal drunk but hey, that's how we Shelby County types do. We start off on the Budweiser etc. and then move on to the powerful stuff like slow-sippin' whisky. Except me. I'm too much of a puss for that nasty liquor. Strong Island Ice Tea though? Betta line em up cuz I'm down to drink those. Course I gotta watch that shit cuz if I have too many I'll be speakin my own language (sexology for those that care) like last Sunday night.
Here's a sample:
Me:(arm around this girl I know) Awww girl, lemme tell ya somethin'...bobbada gleeklatoodical dis sleppa deppa! A heh heh heh.
To appreciate this say my lines in a high-pitched voice (think Curtis Mayfield) and then laugh like the dirtiest old man you have ever heard. That's it. Sexology. Brilliant stuff I think...or at least entertainment at my expense for my friends. But only close friends...I don't get THAT faded very often.
So this Alley Cat bar WAS one of my favorite places to go because it seems that the Broad Ripple bar scene is the embodiment of everything I hated about High-School...Cliques, shitty music, buncha meat-heads and chicken-heads runnin around tryin to get laid while a Dave Matthews song plays in the background. EEEEECH. Bad news indeed. But the Alley Cat was dear to my blackened little heart because it was a grimy little bar where REAL seasoned alcoholics, long-haired men, punk-rockers and everyone else inbetween was/is welcome to drink they're wonderfully priced beverages in a smoke-filled, loud-heavy-metal-playin' environment. Plus, it's just a little cleaner than your average college-basement-house-party.
And it has a buncha pool tables tables and chairs so you can occupy yourself with other things than just hittin on girls or boys or whatever yer into. Plus heavy-metal on the jukebox. Scream along to Pantera!
In my mind, damn near perfect.
Well, that shit is now tainted.
All I know is when I walked in they were playin TLC's "What about your friends" or whatever that shite is.
Man, I knew that was wack when I was like 12 or 13 and I know it's still wack 10-12 years later.
(SCRATCH NOISE): Wikka-wick-wick-WACK!
Plus they cut holes in the walls and opened up the pool room (Well, this is actually a good thing-that place was pretty congested and awkward when it fills up...but I digress). AND, it seemed to me like there was a heavy concentration of chumps all singing along to that "Take on Me" song from the 80's.
It's kinda freaky when yer in a room full of white people yelling
MEEEEEEEEEEEEE (and then others are doing the call and response thing..."take on me!")
So that sucks but the worst is when dude hits the high-note that no-one else can hit:
"blah blah blah...WhooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-(at this point the pitch is hurting any dogs within a 2 mile radius...yep, that screeching high level...unbearable)."
Oh well. I bitch about it now but I know I'll be back. It's better than some bar where they tell you to tuck in your shirt or take off your hat or name the best Nelly song before they'll let you in to go hang out with a buncha preppie bitches (this classification extends to both sexes in my experiences with these bars), so whatever....I just miss the old dingy, grimy, awkwardness of the bar. Plus I might be pissed cuz I saw a dude with a HUGE beard that puts mine to shame and even has me contemplating a little scissor-and-razor action. Oh no!
I hope not, but I think it may be: ALLEY CAT R.I.P.
Welp that's it for now...I have wasted enough time at work and the day is done.
Goin' home to get blazed. I'll update this later on with a real sense of purpose and not just random rants.

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