Wednesday, April 07, 2004

Ah, The Wit and Wisdom of Dead White People

I noticed these in the comments section of Counterspin/Hesiod and thought they were worth stealing without apology. Most of them are Winston Churchill quotes with some history provided.
I plagiarism mercilessly and remain unapologetically.

"Lady Astor wholeheartedly supported the Chamberlain government's appeasement policies, including, of course, his agreement with the devil at Munich. Her eyes were only opened when Hitler took Prague early the next year, at which time, to her credit, she acknowledged Churchill's comprehension of Nazi Germany as having proved superior to her former delusions.

Still, they never clicked on a personal level. Like every great artist, Churchill may well have catalogued a similar remark for future use, but, as likely, probably not. He was a very, very witty guy, who possessed a great sense of humor." They were quoted as having this exchange:

"At an elegant dinner party, Lady Astor once leaned across the table to remark, "If you were my husband, Winston, I'd poison your coffee."
"And if you were my wife, I'd drink it," came Churchill's unhesitating retort."

The author continues:
"The British are good at the withering insult. Winding back a number of decades, to when Disraeli and Gladstone were regularly at each other's throats, in Parliament. Disraeli had used the words 'disaster' and 'catastrophe' in the same sentence, and Gladstone objected, he found the sentence imprecise, and wanted Disraeli to distinguish between disaster and catastrophe.

d!Israeli: If the honored Gladstone were to fall in the Thames, that would be a disaster. Were he to be helped out, that would be a catastrophe.

The House exploded with laughter."

To which another person adds:

"There's also this exchange between those two:

Gladstone: Sir! You will meet your end either on the gallows or of venereal disease.

Disraeli: I should think that depends entirely upon whether I embrace your principles or your mistress."
Smashing! And here's the last one:

"Clever things that Churchill probably did say:

In Parliament in the 1950s, when he still sat even though he was no longer Tory leader, two backbenchers sat behind him. One whispered "they say he’s gone senile. Poor chap."

Churchilll turned right around and roared "They say he has also gone deaf as well!!"

Ah, that Churchill, such a cad. Same goes for Glandstone and Disraeli.
Go to this site for more mad-cap fun, tilted language and a monkey and a crow. Enjoy!





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