Wednesday, November 17, 2004

NO WONDER THIS COUNTRY IS FUCKED...

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even giraffe-neck Asians are pissed off...

Okay, so obviously ya'll are still disillusioned by the outcome of the presidential election and as a result have decided to quit voting altogether. This MUST be the only reason you did not participate in my "Liza Minelli beats up the weak male of your choosing" (scroll down), because obviously, this is an important topic that needs to be addressed and yet, not ONE person has commented. Ya'll have let me down goddammit. I sentence you all to listen to the new Black Eyed Peas album on infinite repeat until you vote. Now if only I could figure out a way to serve up that punishment...I'd start a blog radio thing but fuck it-I'm internet retarded, so just know dear readers: you have let me down. Start leaving comments okay? They are like little rocks of crack that give me validation, self-worth and an awesome buzz. Got that? Good.

Now that we've cleared that mess up, I think we should check the links I have provided below.
You should all know that I have decided to deem myself an enemy combatant of Jesusland so that I can provide aid and comfort to their enemies in order for the masters of Jesusland to lose their grip on power. This will include (but not be limited to) subversive activities, links to articles critical of Jesusland and (hopefully) treasonous and seditious comments. Let the fun begin:
Should Canada charge Bush with War Crimes? Yes.
Those crazy snipers and their luddite-approach to modern warfare! Black flags equal more Hoosier blood on the streets of Fallujah. This isn't as bad as it sounds. Trust me.
Here's a list of my newest enemies: 5 GOP Senators for Jesusland. They're crazy about Christ!
Remember: When you buy drugs you help the terrorists. Unless of course, the U.S. is helping these drug-growing terrorists. That is free-enterprise and that is totally cool. On a side note, I say bring me all the Afghani weed I can smoke. In fact, bring me about 4 years worth and I'll put it in the freezer and I swear I won't touch it until at least Bluntsgiving Day. Mmmm...
Oh but back to those pesky Iraqi's who won't get out of the way of American bullets. Can't they understand that America is trying to help them be democratic by killing them? Why don't they get it?
Soldiers of Jesusland kill wounded and unarmed Iraqis. Hearts and minds...hearts and minds.
On a side note:
Does anyone else laugh when they watch the news and some parent of a dead soldier is talking about how their child died a hero because they were "protecting their country and our [Americans] right to be free"? HA HA HA! Excuse me. I mean, I guess they do have to say that so they can pretend that their loss is acceptable. I mean, when your child dies for no good reason I guess you do have to lie to yourself to make sure you don't start climbing bell-towers or something...
Also, I laugh my ass off when they interview some sucker in combat over there in Iraq and he's all like "Yeah, we're doing the right thing. It feels good to know that I'm defending my country and the rights of my fellow citizens blah blah blah". I wonder if these cats are that wistful and optimistic when some skinny 14 year old Iraqi blows their legs off with an RPG because some Marines "accidentally" killed his sister and now dogs are eating her remains.
Boy I'm full of bile today. Ya'll shoulda commented on my L. Minelli post and this wouldn't have happened. If you need a break from my anger go click on the "Maakies" link on the right hand side for some jocular fun. Otherwise, leave comments or expect more grim posts...
*out*


Comments:
A dollar for psychology.
 
"A dollar for psychology"?
As in, you will contribute a dollar towards psychiatric help for me? If so, I'd rather have a dollar towards marijuana or at least Miller High Life (or High Life Light...it's not that bad...).
 
For the record, High Life Light is that bad.

Onward towards substance.

I appreciate your unfettered rage against the minions of "Jesusland", but it's time to let the wolves feast. Remember, "America has spoken" and all that other bullshit. I say it's time to watch the great country we used to be fall to shambles under the greasy rule of antichrist dub. I say let these SOB's completely fuck us over militarily, economically, socially, religiously. That's what it is going to take to wake america up...unprecedented backsliding towards chaos.

Only when the soccer moms have no children to haul around in their overblown SUV's will they understand the error of the W. Only when the once prosperous family farmer in the midwest is hooked on meth and his daughter is hookn' for bread money will he understand. Only when the religious right finally gets the "Mayberry" Andie Griffith reality they pretend america has lost and the prisons are literally bursting at the seams with unpious and unamerican human trash, like you and I, waiting for our deserved executions will they wake up.

It's too fucking bad, but it's gonna take a pile of bodies high enough to block out the sun to shake the right from their political "faith". Were working on one in Iraq because they were resopnsible for 9-11, right.

We are going to have to let this place unravel, to crumble before our very eyes before an actual correction to our current path can be brought to the light of day. Revolution will come, but not after many dark days.

So splurge and pick up a full bodied beer because your're gonna need a good thick fat reserve to get you through the thin years ahead. No amount of logic or inter-nation diplomacy will slow our decent, the past recent election is proof of that. Our parent's had nixon to hate, we have a much more heinous beast to quell.
 
I used to work in a resturant with a tip jar and every morning someone would have to drop in "a dollar for psychology" or else the customers wouldn't think to leave anything.
 
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