Sunday, June 05, 2005

MEET MY NEIGHBOR


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As both of my readers know I recently moved into a suburban housing complex where they try and cram as many similar-looking houses into a small area (usually some old field a farmer no longer farms) so they can entice people looking for a new affordable home to move in and create some sort of neighborhood. Mainly the neighborhood aspect fails (at least in this neighborhood) because many residents are more concerned with yelling at their "little mistakes" than establishing relationships with those around them. Now granted, I have had a teenage neighbor come over and introduce himself, but since he chose to pontificate his disdain for Homosexuals and Mexicans, I don't really consider him an equal, or for that matter, a human being. In short, my neighbors are little more than un-educated crackas who think that because I'm Caucasian I will join their "White-Pride Ride" down the streets of Wanamaker, Indiana.

Of course, there are exceptions to this rule.

I could bore you with the details of how I found out that one of my neighbors is a stripper/escort, but no one really cares as long as I give up the address to her homepage. So in the intereest of keeping you two interested in my ramblings I now offer you the key to my neighborhood salvation:


Please visit the spot Go ahead, open up a new window and visit my favorite new neighbor.

I first noticed Fantasy Liz about 2 years ago when I moved into the neighborhood and noticed her walking her "little mistake"(this was before I moved out to eventually move back but I digress...). At first I was like "Damn that's a fine MILF!!!" but then later(about 10 days ago) I found out through my brother that she is an established stripper with a webpage. So now that I have internets access I do my best to visit my friendly neighbor as often as my cable modem allows. Now instead of oogling her through binoculars I can oogle her via the internets, which is much more comfortable. Yay!

Either way, I think it's awesome that at least one of my neighbors has found a way to escape the white-trash confines of my neighborhood by posting pictures of herself sucking dick on the internet. If any of my neighbors looked anywhere near as hot as Liz I would definately encourage them to try their hand at the internet stripper/escort game but since she's the best looking Caucasian in the 'hood I gotta give props. So hey, if any of you dear readers are up for donating a small monetary fee so I can rent Fantasy Liz for an evening and blow her back out feel free to drop me a line (or a check) at chiseven@gmail.com. Otherwise, just bookmark her site and laugh at the fact that there's some soft-core porn being documented in my neighborhood while I sit here and type out little blog-enties without getting any of that poo-nanny. My neighborhood rules.

*out*

Comments:
you talk to this beeyo....girl?

if so, itd be the shit if you got a pic of her holding a "ban kanye" sign

also - how do males get into the internets pr0n business? nhjic
 
haven't talked to her yet, but I can't wait to be like: "aww waddap girl, I saw you suckin dick on the internet. Nice work!" But on second thought, I think I'd rather see her holding a "Ban Kanye" sign than her response to my question. I think she's in Vegas right now (yep I read her webpage)but if I see her watering the grass or whatever I'll ask her for a picture. As far as the internet pr0n business goes I would imagine it takes a savvy mind, some willing girls, a digital camera and working knowledge of html. In short, you are closer than you think.
 
dammit! i need a fucking digital camera, right fucking now.
 
Just slap her ass next time you walk by her. Classy women like her love that kind of stuff.

I am willing to send you some loose change to blow out her back.
 
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